EEEK! I’m Not Dead But I’m Not Shopping Either

WhatACarWhatABurger, originally uploaded by carolWorldLeader.

EEE-Extreme Earbud Entanglement

The state or condition of having ones ipod earbuds become so entangled as to induce hysteria (or, at least, to cause one to miss the first entire song on the shuffle playlist, should you happen to be one of those “I plug in after I push the middle button” types.)

Ok, that’s it. I so need to go shopping. Mother’s Day is next week, Mom wants all these little things, like a new slotted spoon and a colander that has actual working “feet,” my ears hurt from the damned “default” podling earbuds, so I need like cool painless Nike ones or just *something* better, I need some foam core for a photography project I’m trying to work on, and I could really use some new shoes (well, ok, that’s a stretch. Forget the shoes.)

I don’t know why but, somehow, I’ve developed this extreme mall avoidance. I don’t want to go anywhere near the place, despite the fact that I drive by it practically every day. It’s like I need to shop, I want to shop, I know I *should* shop (well, except for the shoes) but I don’t actually want to go there. I just can’t bring myself to do it.

What’s happening to me? I think I’ve developed some strange social disease, like mall-a-phobia or something.

Actually, maybe I’ve had it all along. On the whole, I’d rather be sitting on my back porch reading a book, engrossed in an engaging lookout for shooting stars, watching TREE gently blow in the breeze, or so. Even watching the grass grow taller, at this point in time, would be more interesting to me than the local mall. There’s just something about that place that puts me out.

They say that W.C. Fields really hated Philadelphia, so much so that, when he died, he requested from his heirs that they inscribe on his tombstone the words, “On the Whole, I’d Rather be in Philadelphia.”

If I should die anytime soon, well, my snowflakes, I trust you’ll know just what to say (and, please, make sure they bury me alongside some badass souls, or, um, soles.)

“Here’s Lies Carol. She finally has enough CompactFlash. Too bad she can’t use it where she’s going.”

Until next tombstone…


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