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Some Prose and the new Queen of Cyan

OK, so I gave you some prose to read. Are you happy now? Wasn’t that just exactly what you were waiting for? Isn’t you life just so much more complete now that you can read this crap? Didn’t you know there’s a reason why I’m not a real writer, I just play one on TV? Anyway, it’s down below for you to enjoy, snicker at, scarf up, or use as lining for you…um…I can’t say it, not after that story (see below for the gory details.)

I painted the office yesterday (actually Sunday technically, seeing as the clock rolled officially almost two hours ago.) It’s a nice blue. A little intense, but I’m liking it. It was driving me absolutely batty to live in a completely white house for more than two years. I was going crazy. And speaking of crazy, I heard a great quote the other day, “Craziness runs in my family. It pratically gallops.” So true, I can relate.

Haven’t been getting much sleep as of late. And I was really depressed up until I started painting the office. Winter’s coming and the light’s getting crappy. Just when I really want to shoot, the light starts getting crappy. And, when I’m under the weather or just not in the mood, bam, great day with pufty clouds. It’s just my luck, or lack thereof, that causes this. I suppose I should just get some hot lights and stay indoors to do some polaroids. I can always do polaroids. But, seriously, I think somehow I’m allergic to pufty clouds. I mean, I love them and all but I can’t seem to get my lazy caffeine deprived butt outdoors to take any pictures when they are around. And they never seem to stay for all that long.

Speaking of crazy, I’m starting to develop this complex. It has to do with the color magenta. Sure, being an artist and all, I’m not opposed to any specific color on the wheel, and I’ve learned to work my mojo to make the most of a lot of them. But lately magenta has been giving me grief. It started when I tried to print some of my own stuff to send into a competition. I would put a sheet of paper in the shoot, press a button and out would pop a magenta photograph. I’m not talking a cast here, it was fully and nothing but magenta. But I got over it.

Then, this Sunday, I head off to Home Depot to purchase paint. So I put my order in for two gallons at the counter with the nice, friendly orange aproned home decorating demi-God and I’m checking out the power tools for five minutes. Since I’m financially challenged, my foray in the power tools lasted but a few brief seconds before I went back to paintland. So Mr. Orange Apron is pulling paint from the mixer. I notice one gallon come out of the shoot with the Ralph Lauren suede label (mine, mine, mine!) and it’s got the name “CAROL” scrawled across the top. Ok, so I found one gallon, the second must be right next to it, right? So I put my hand on mystery gallon number two and what do I find? Um, you guessed it. Magenta. So I pull my hand back and kind of “yeow!” when the demi-God says, “lady, don’t worry, that paint ain’t open yet.” I didn’t have the heart to tell him of my newfound fear of all things magenta.

For now, I’m going to file this in the “you can run but you can’t hide” department. But, if it should happen that magenta and I cross paths one more little, sneaky time….so help me…I’m telling you now. It’s trouble. I mean, where’s that damned cyan when you need him most? And please don’t tell me “it’s not easy being green” because I’ve heard it all before.

Until next time, this is Carol, the Carol in “Carol’s Little World” signing off.


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