Some say he’s inorganic by birth. Some say he doesn’t actually drive fast, it’s just that he’s been chronologically inept since the year 2049. All we know is…he’s called The Stig

Some say that whistling sound you hear isn’t his tea kettle. Run! Now! Some say, just like the Hindenburg, if he had a blimp, he’d blow it up. All we know is…he’s called The Stig

Some say he’s seen more half-naked women than Merkley himself. Some say he drives rather slowly once he takes off his 42 nicotine patches. All we know is…he’s called The Stig

Some say he once hit a muskrat doing over 150 mph Some say, “…and your point is?” All we know is…he’s called The Pancake Maker

Some say he beats everyone at Scrabble because he knows that Zymurgy is really a word. Some say he’d be just as good at Monopoly except that he insists on being the little race car…