No, relax, I’m not getting married. Though, I did, at one point, swear I would “should the world ever come to an end, Hell freeze over, and all that.”
It’s the end of the world! It’s the end of the world! Aren’t you glad now that you weren’t one of those 300 million dollar winners in the lottery? What’s that, you say? Didn’t hear about the whole “end of the world” thing yet?
This weekend, is daylight savings time. Now, usually, I *love* daylight savings time-it affords me more time to take pictures in the evening and, well, I just hate mornings anyway, so they might as well be dark, right?
But, not this year. This year? Oh, this year, daylight savings time is going to be pure Hell. Microsoft, one of my, ahem, “favorite” companies, it seems, released a series of patches to, ahem, “fix” daylight savings time. Yeah right, that could work. (AND MONKEYS FLY OUTTA MY BUTT!) Every computer in the known universe is going to shut down at the strike of midnight, actually, 1 am (and again, as it were, on 2 am precisely 1 second later) That’s right, my snowflakes. “Spring ahead/fall back” is going to…well….fall down.
So, what does all this mean to you?
Water. Buy lots and lots of bottled water. Duct tape, get money from the ATM, and like, sit in your living room with a helmet on, ok? Maybe even put plastic over the windows. Why? Because, well, Sunday’s going to be the end of the world.
There was a blurb on ZDNet about this today. Here’s a quote: “I was requested to call Microsoft support because of my particular problem,” [Microsoft customer Paul] Marsh said. “I called Microsoft support. I was 117th in the queue and was informed the wait was 3 hours. I waited 4 hrs and 45 minutes but no one ever picked up. If I hear Microsoft hold music again I think I’ll go mad. The bottom line is ‘Hello Microsoft! There is a problem!’ and we have something like 42 hours to figure this out.”
I can already smell the Mac add about this one. Cut to Bill Gates/Steve Jobs clones on my TV set. Bill clone is frantic on the telephone, “I can’t get through! i can’t get through! I hate hold music…” Steve Jobs clone: “What’s wrong PC?” Bill Gates clone: “It’s Daylight Savings Tiiiiiimmmmmmmeeeeeee….” [Kills Self]
Oh the horror. Wedding cake, anyone?
Until next, um, yeah, we can only dream up more of that…
PS Excuse me, I’m busy running off to buy stock in companies that sell bottled water, duct tape, helmets, and Microsoft consulting services.